Going through a break up or a divorce is a overwhelming experience. There was a time that you really believed the two of you were in love, but now you find yourself all alone and feeling awful. You are angry, sad, confused and have even felt a spasm of guilt. To be blunt, it sucks. Regardless of why you are no longer as one, you now know that it's painful getting over an ex. Here are some thoughts that will help you get on with your life, and ultimately start feeling better.
Let's start by asking a straightforward question. Do you still want to get your ex back? While it may or may not happen, the point is that you will never be able to move on if you're holding on to the thought of working things out. That's because you won't get your feelings in check as long as you are dreaming about getting your ex back. You will also be thinking about them too much, and that's not going to help either. Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't try getting your ex back. But I am saying that you will certainly not get over them as long as you are trying.
Assuming you have no intentions of getting back together, you can move on to the next step. If you are contacting your ex, or they are contacting you, then you need to make that stop. That means no phone calls, no emails, no texting and no bumping into them "accidentally". If your ex is the one doing these things then you need to make it very clear that they are to stop without more ado. You have a right to your privacy, and they need to respect that right.
The next part of the process can be harder, but it is essential. The idea is to forget about them for a while by erasing as many traces of them as you can; at least for the time being. So, if you have photographs of the two of you, store them away, or give them to a trusted relative for safe keeping. Take their number off your cell phone; delete them from your Facebook account, and anything else you can think of. Again, this doesn't have to be permanent. It's really just a way to reset your life without having constant reminders of your ex gumming up the process. You can get those things back after you are completely over your ex.
If, despite your best efforts, you just can't find any way of getting over an ex, then you should give serious consideration to seeing a therapist. They have had lots of experience with helping people deal with various things in their lives and that includes getting over an ex. Some people feel uncomfortable about getting professional help, but there is no need to feel that way. After all, if it means you will be able to feel better and live a more well-balanced life, then it will definitely be a great decision.
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