Dealing With a Break Up of a Long Term Relationship

If you are looking for a cure to dealing with a break up, keep in mind that there is no magic pill to cure what you are feeling and it may take a while to get over your relationship. You need to take one day at a time, maybe even one hour at a time in the opening stages.

Do not let anyone talk you out of feeling what you need to feel. You may get to the point where you feel you are better off without your ex, but right now the hurt and anger is almost overwhelming.

When dealing with a break up, be careful that you do not let your emotions take over and end up doing something dim. Stay close to home and if you do not think you can be alone with yourself, invite a good friend over and cry on their shoulder. If you need to hit something make it something soft like a pillow. Go ahead; beat the crap out of that pillow. You will probably feel better when you are done.

After a few weeks, when the pain has subsided somewhat and you feel like you can breathe again, get out of the house and go do something fun. Remind yourself that you have survived the worst of the pain and realize that you are still alive and life does go on.

Try to resist going to the places you went to with your ex, revisiting all your old haunts is no cure for dealing with a break up. They probably still go to those places and it is still way too soon to run into them. You need more time.

Do things to make yourself feel good. Go shopping and treat yourself to a new outfit, or make an appointment with your stylist and get a new hairstyle. Concentrate on you for a change and the pain will become less and less every day.

When dealing with a break up it is best that you do not try to contact your ex in any way right after the break up. You do not need to give them the pleasure of knowing you are not ok. Make them think you are getting over them and on with your life. Some part of them probably still cares about you and maybe even feels guilty for the hurt they caused. If they are made to think you are doing well without them they may get a little jealous and who knows... they may just come running back to you.

A great way to get your feelings out and deal with them in a strong way is to write them down. Start keeping a journal and faithfully write in it every day. You can safely express what you are feeling in your journal. You can even tell off your ex with no repercussions at all. Let your fingers do the yelling. It doesn't matter how you keep your journal, in a notebook or on your computer. Just start writing and before you know it you will have found that YOU are the cure for dealing with a break up.

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The Chances of Getting Back With Ex - Slim or Good

You are desperate to know what your odds of getting back with ex are. Well, that depends on you and the amount of graft you are willing to put into trying to win them back. Some would say you have no control over this and that if your ex wants to come back then they will... if not... they will not. I do not necessarily agree with that line of thinking. There are things you can do to persuade your ex to reconsider their judgment to leave you.

There is plenty of help out there. You can do a search online for self-help eBooks or join a forum for some guidance on what to do. A lot of what you will hear and read may shock you, especially if you hold some animosity toward your ex for the things that went wrong. You will hear that a lot of the problem sits in your lap and if you want your ex back you need to work on yourself and the reasons they gave for breaking up with you.

They left for a reason but no matter what that rationale is or was you have the ability to get them back. You must be willing to do whatever it takes to make changes for the better and then find a way to let your ex see those changes. The chances of getting back with ex will increase to the highest degree if you take this step.

Your ex may see the changes you have made and start to reassess their decision or they may think you are full of BS and try not to care or not trust that you can change. Do not get disheartened, no one said this would be easy. If they rebuff you out of hand then just keep making the improvements in yourself. Do not get annoyed; accept that they cannot trust you right now because of past mistakes and work to become an improved person.

Did you know that with a modest effort 95% of relationships can be saved? That's right, if we all learned how to reach our full potential as human beings we could turn the 1 in 2 marriages that end in divorce around and most everyone could be happy.

Because men and women are so different we cannot expect to just move in together and be happy. There is a learning curve that most people just do not get. Too often when the honeymoon is over so is the marriage because couples just expect things to be perfect like they seem to be when you first get together. Love is definitely blind.

Sure... you met and fell in love but that is not all a good relationship is built on, nor can love sustain a relationship. It is a great building block or starting point but do not rely on it to keep things going. You also need mutual respect and willingness to compromise instead of getting annoyed when you do not get your way on every little point of contention. This only reduces the chances of getting back with ex.

If you do not learn these things and put them into practice during your relationship you will have to learn them when the relationship is over and then figure out what your chances of getting back with ex are at that point.

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How Can I Get My Girlfriend Back After I Cheated On Her?

 

The answer to the question 'how can I get my girlfriend back?' is yes... almost certainly. You see if your girl still loves you, no matter how much you've messed up in the past, she will more than likely be receptive to you if you can prove to her that she won't be wasting her time and that she won't get hurt again. No one wants to be hurt and no one wants to set themselves up to be hurt by trusting someone who has already proven they can't be trusted. For this reason you will almost certainly be able to win her back but you had better expect an uphill climb. 

The first step in the ‘how can I get my girlfriend back?’ solution is to give her a little time and space. Don't rush her or anticipate everything to happen quickly. It takes a lot longer to reconstruct trust than it took to tear it apart.  More than likely by the time you've gotten to this point you've let her down more than once. Please don't think that all that past hurt and all those mistakes will go away and she'll forget about them just because you say 'I'm sorry' or you tell her that ‘I've altered’. She'll almost certainly need to see some evidence that that is true.

It's imperative for you to concentrate on yourself instead of just trying to persuade her you've changed. It will take you time to truly change the person that you are and you don't want to make the mistake of thinking you can somehow ‘scam’ her into believing you are a different man. This is definitely not the answer to how can I get my girlfriend back?

It's true, you may be able to but what will that achieve? Eventually she'll just see that you've lied to her... again and she'll just leave you all over again. Eventually she won't fall for it and the two of you will truly be done. It’s much better to actually make the changes and make them everlastingly.  It will not only give you the answer to the question 'how can I get my girlfriend back?' it will also help you to keep the relationship strong and just make you a better man on the whole.

Depending on how much time has elapsed since the two of you broke up, you may want to start all over again. Imagine like the two of you are just getting to know each other. Take it very slow. The worst thing you can do at that point is to try and talk her into trusting you again. This is just more lip service. Instead try to spend time with her, just as a friend, and let her see that you've really changed. When she sees it with her own eyes it's much more likely that she'll learn to trust you again.

Remember, if you want to know 'how can I get my girlfriend back?' the answer really lies mostly with you. Love doesn't die that easily so unless you really treated her badly it's very likely that she still cares for you. It's up to you to prove to her that she's not a fool for it.

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