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Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Marriage Counseling Questions and Answers

What questions are the most common marriage counseling questions your therapist will ask you during your sessions? Probably the most important question you will be asked is, "Why are you here?" Now, you might think to yourself that the answer to this question is a big, "DUH!" But, the therapist cannot hear you think and needs to find out exactly why you have come to see them to devise a plan to help the two of you particular to your issues.
Problems can rear their ugly heads at any time during a relationship and sometimes can cause such pressure and strife that you just have no clue as to how to handle them. These are the times when a counselor can be helpful. Instead of thinking that the relationship is over it is best to get another view and try to save the marriage.
Once the issues are out in the open, your therapist will ask more marriage counseling questions like, "Which issue do you think you need to start working on first to help save the marriage?" The two of you may have different issues that you deem most significant and the counselor may suggest that they see the two of you individually for a time and then bring you both together for couples counseling.
When the two of you are brought collectively to talk to each other you will be monitored closely by the therapist and will be required to follow some basics. The therapist will tell you to try hard not to play the blame game. This may be difficult to do especially if the biggest issue you have as a couple is some form of unfaithfulness.
Most marriages do not survive unfaithfulness. More power to you if you think you can forgive and forget and work though it. Coming out the other side better for the experience is very tricky to accomplish and I have just one thing to say. Good luck, you will need it.
You may ask your therapist if they think that the marriage can be saved with marriage counseling questions. They will be able to give you a better answer to that question once they get to know you and your spouse and the severity of the problems between you. If you are willing to do the work, anything is possible.
Your counselor will help you wade through all the mess that has built up over time and get right down to the essentials of what is really the issue causing all the trouble in your relationship. This is vital because if there are long-standing problems then you may not even know or remember what started it all and there can be a lot of bewilderment about the real reason there is trouble.
Sometimes asking hard-hitting marriage counseling questions is the only way to get down to the root cause of the trouble in your marriage and also the only way to repair a broken relationship. So be prepared to take a good long look at yourself and your spouse and your relationship.
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Monday, 22 August 2011

How to Save My Marriage from Impending Doom!

Are you asking the question: how to save my marriage? In many cases the longer the problems are allowed to grow, the bitterness and fury are allowed to build up, the harder it can be to pull your relationship back from the precipice. It can be difficult, but it's not unattainable.
There are several things you'll need to have in place if you want your marriage to work and the first one is a burning desire to make it work. And it's not enough for just one of you to have that; you both need to have it.  If one or the other of you is indifferent, or worse, doesn't want to, save the marriage, there really isn't much that can be done. A marriage is a partnership; if you both aren't working together it's not going to work.
Step one to answer the question: how to save my marriage... is to make sure you are both willing to put in the time and effort. Step two is finding the exact issues that are plaguing you and finding solutions to them. It's easy to think that your wife gets mad at you for leaving the toilet seat up or not putting your socks in the hamper, and while those things probably do annoy her, it's not the reason your marriage is falling apart. They just add to the resentment, hurt and anger your wife is feeling because of something that you've said or done.
The same holds true if your husband yells at you because you burnt his dinner or his shirts aren't getting clean enough in the wash.
Step two to answer the question: how to save my marriage... in order to really make things better you both need to determine what the real problems are... and fix those.  Try to cut through all the excess issues and focus in on the real issues.  Do the two of you really talk? Do you really know how to express love, affection, anxiety, or hurt in productive ways? Most people don't. Until you can learn these skills you will continue to be misunderstood and frustrated. If neither of you knows how to communicate productively you'll both feel alienated, frustrated, hurt and angry.  That will not get you anywhere you want to go.
Step three to answer the question: how to save my marriage... is to find someone who can help you get to the point where you both know how to communicate honestly how you are feeling. If you do it the right way, your partner is much less likely to get angry and defensive. Part of learning to communicate is to know what to say as well as how to say it.  If you say things in such a way as to make it sound like you are accusing your partner, or blaming them, than all you're going to accomplish is to make your partner mad and they will lash out at you. Before you know it, the two of you are in a brawl and no one 'wins'.
A good counsellor can help steer the two of you in the right direction and help you each stay calm. They can teach both of you how to express yourself in a constructive manner that will increase the chances of being heard and decrease the chances of getting in a fight.
This deceptively simple three step process can answer the question: how to save my marriage from impending doom!
How can you mend a broken heart? Check out the best relationship manual on the web... Click Here... and watch a FREE video from an ordinary guy that has helped 50000+ couples find happiness and lasting love!

Answering the Question of Why Do I Want My Ex Back

Going through a break up is one of the toughest things that people have to go through as part of their lives. People get hurt, and it can be hard to face each new day. However, as time passes, we start to miss our ex, and it gets to a point where we want them back so much, that we start to question ourselves, we want to know "Why do I want my ex back?"
While such a question may play tricks with your head, you should know that it is perfectly reasonable, and that many other people have asked the same question. It is not a sign that you are going crazy, far from it. Your friends keep telling you that you should just move on and forget about your ex, and you agree with them, at least on the surface. But deep down... you keep hearing that little voice telling you to try to get back with your ex. However, there are a few things to think about before you take the next step.
We are working under the assumption that you are asking "why do I want my ex back?" No problem. The first thing you should do is consider what you have just gone through. Remember, a break up can cause problems with your emotions, and prevent you from thinking as clearly as you normally would. This doesn't mean your thoughts are right or wrong, but you should look at them closely to see how you really feel, and what the real cause of those feelings are.
Chances are that the both of you didn't meet and instantly have a deep, meaningful relationship; it just doesn't happen. Especially if either one of you had been hurt before. Relationships typically take time to grow and develop. They also take some work and a certain level of compromise. Needless to say, putting this amount of effort into something, only to see it fail can be devastating. In other words, you don't really want your ex back, what you really want is for the relationship to work out. After all, you have a part of your heart and soul invested into it.
After you have taken some time to consider why you want your ex back, it's time to take action. There are really only two choices you have at this stage. You may decide that your mind is playing tricks on you, and that you don't really want them back. In this case all you need to do is live with those thoughts and let them eventually subside. Your other choice is to accept that your mind is ending you the right message and that you really do want your ex back. If this is your choice, then you have your work cut out for you.
You will have to contact your ex and let them know how you feel. You will have to try to patch things up and show them that it can work out this time. There are changes you'll have to make, but if you are serious about getting back together, it won't be too difficult. By following the above advice you will be able to answer the question of "why do I want my ex back" by saying, "I'm glad we're back together."
How can you mend a broken heart? Check out the best relationship manual on the web... Click Here... and watch a FREE video from an ordinary guy that has helped 50000+ couples find happiness and lasting love!