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Tuesday, 8 March 2011

Five Free Tips on How to Get Your Ex Back for Good

So your goal is to get back with your ex and you want some free tips on how to get your ex back. The very first thing you need to do is re-evaluate this. You may be putting yourself through some unnecessary drama if this relationship wasn't meant to be. If, however, you are convinced that there is nothing better that you can be doing than getting your ex back, there are several things that will help you accomplish that.

1) Don't get over ambitious. It can be easy to get passionate about getting back together. Nothing wrong with a little passion, but there is such a thing as taking it too far. If you try to force the issue or try to move things too quickly you could end up scaring your ex off.

2) Regain control of your life. It may seem like things have spun out of control since the break up, but that isn't going to help you get your ex back. If you want to have a relationship that is more under control, then it needs to have partners in it who are in control of their own life. Not only will this give the relationship a better chance, it will help you look more attractive. People are drawn to confidence and if you are in control of things you will have that confidence.

3) Avoid the drive-by. You may be incredibly interested in what is going on in their life and you might miss them terribly, but try to avoid driving by their house. This will only help you look obsessed and desperate. You are more likely to get a restraining order than you are to get your ex back.

4) Give it some time and space. If the relationship just recently ended, allow a cushion in there. If you force yourself back into their life when they want a break from you, any bad feelings that they have towards you will only be amplified. Allow them a chance to miss you and for them to cool down their negative thoughts towards you.

5) Don't bother their friends and family. It's not a bad thing to be concerned or worried about them. It isn't a bad thing to want to know what they are doing. It is a bad thing to start pestering the ones they care about. If you keep calling them or keep inquiring about your ex, they may get tired of you quickly. Few people want to be a middle man and most people resent being put in that situation. When that happens, they will most likely not have good things to say about you when they talk to your ex.

There are many other things that you can do that may help you get your ex back. Just make sure that in your efforts you don't push them further away. The best free tips on how to get your ex back will help you accomplish that.

Monday, 7 March 2011

Does Love Help You Live Longer - The Real Answer

Does love help you live longer? What a great question! Statistics show that happily married couples live as much as five years longer than their single counterparts (with the effect being somewhat more pronounced in married men). Because it is so subjective, it is impossible to accurately measure love with statistics. However, with a cursory glance of the data, it seems reasonably safe to assume that love, does, in some way, lead people to spend a few more years among the living.

Everybody agrees that being loved is a wonderful feeling. Knowing that somebody cares for us is hard to explain in words, but it sure feels good! Heck, I wouldn't be surprised if you smiled a little bit just now thinking about the people that love you. And though true love towards someone doesn't require that they love you back, I bet you just so happen to return love to those who love you most.

Loving others means you are unselfish when dealing with them. Caring for someone else's happiness and well-being takes your focus off of you and puts other people first. This can be a marvellous way to reduce stress that would otherwise steal years from our lives.

Another quick answer to the question "does love help you live longer" is, "hate sure makes you die sooner". Hating others only increases other negative feelings and stress. Have you ever felt a certain something pumping through your body when you hate someone or something? Your whole physiology changes, besides, its wasted energy, because those that are the subject of our hatred either don't care how we feel, or have no idea how we feel.

One more aspect of love and longevity is that love often gives us a reason to keep on living. Men and women throughout the world have survived horrendous situations (man-made and natural) only because they focused on seeing their loved ones once again. If that's not a testament to the life-extending power of love, I don't know what is!

The connection between emotional health and physical health is still not completely understood. However, there are clear links between the two. The human body is, in many ways, greater than the sum of its parts. Another way to look at it is if we are in prime physical shape, but are emotional wrecks, then we are not getting all life has to offer.

Let's be realistic for a moment, shall we? Love may not keep you from getting hit by a bus when crossing the street, but it can make recovering from such an accident more bearable. Even if love can't be proven to help you live longer, I know I would rather have a few short years of loving someone, instead of having several lifetimes without any love at all.

There are two easy ways to use love to increase the quality of life. The first is to show love towards others. That not only includes family and friends, but everyone you deal with in some capacity. The second way can be a bit trickier for some: allow others to love you. Keep the following phrase in mind as you go about your day, and see what a difference it makes. The phrase…? "Let love happen".

Sunday, 6 March 2011

Successfully Dealing With Ending a Relationship


The earliest writings we know of (both secular and religious) talk about how to handle couples breaking up and even though it has been going on for millennia, dealing with ending a relationship has not got any easier. Hearts get broken, people get hurt, and it can be painful and confusing at the same time. Here are some things for you to consider, helping you navigate a relationship that's ending.

The first thing you need to convince yourself of is that the past is the past. It is a common tactic to try to purposely erase the memory of your ex completely from your mind. But, trying to forget it means you are focusing on it. In other words, you are turning the past into the present. By doing that, you can be sure that you are dredging up old, painful memories and that you will feel miserable in the process

As mentioned it's not easy, in fact, it can be emotionally wrenching and one of the toughest things to face as you go through life. It may seem impossible now, but you must let things run their course. Give it some time. They say "time heals all wounds", and though it's difficult and you feel awful, the saying is true. Keep this in mind as you're dealing with ending a relationship.

Another thing you must do is establish firm ground rules, especially if you know there will be situations where you are likely to encounter one another; work is one such example. Your best bet is to keep things as platonic as possible at first. Sure, there were good times, but you don't want to start talking about them immediately after the break up. You also want to avoid talking about the bad times, or whatever led to the breakup.

When dealing with ending a relationship, you may want to do your best to avoid your ex, but don't do this to the point of obsession. If you are trying too hard to avoid them, you are, in reality, giving them more power, and not dealing with your real feelings.

By the same token, you need to understand that the relationship is over, at least for now. Don't make the mistake of being overly friendly to show you are "back to normal". It will only make you look foolish or phoney. You may also want to get back together, but you just have to give this some time. If you try jumping back in too quickly, you run a high risk of alienating your ex even further.

Perhaps you will never get back together, maybe you have no intentions of doing so, but it's always a good idea to get along with other people. Following the tips above will leave the door open to the possibility of reconciling, or, at the very least, not having your blood boil every time you hear of or see your ex.