Dealing With a Break Up of a Long Term Relationship

If you are looking for a cure to dealing with a break up, keep in mind that there is no magic pill to cure what you are feeling and it may take a while to get over your relationship. You need to take one day at a time, maybe even one hour at a time in the opening stages.

Do not let anyone talk you out of feeling what you need to feel. You may get to the point where you feel you are better off without your ex, but right now the hurt and anger is almost overwhelming.

When dealing with a break up, be careful that you do not let your emotions take over and end up doing something dim. Stay close to home and if you do not think you can be alone with yourself, invite a good friend over and cry on their shoulder. If you need to hit something make it something soft like a pillow. Go ahead; beat the crap out of that pillow. You will probably feel better when you are done.

After a few weeks, when the pain has subsided somewhat and you feel like you can breathe again, get out of the house and go do something fun. Remind yourself that you have survived the worst of the pain and realize that you are still alive and life does go on.

Try to resist going to the places you went to with your ex, revisiting all your old haunts is no cure for dealing with a break up. They probably still go to those places and it is still way too soon to run into them. You need more time.

Do things to make yourself feel good. Go shopping and treat yourself to a new outfit, or make an appointment with your stylist and get a new hairstyle. Concentrate on you for a change and the pain will become less and less every day.

When dealing with a break up it is best that you do not try to contact your ex in any way right after the break up. You do not need to give them the pleasure of knowing you are not ok. Make them think you are getting over them and on with your life. Some part of them probably still cares about you and maybe even feels guilty for the hurt they caused. If they are made to think you are doing well without them they may get a little jealous and who knows... they may just come running back to you.

A great way to get your feelings out and deal with them in a strong way is to write them down. Start keeping a journal and faithfully write in it every day. You can safely express what you are feeling in your journal. You can even tell off your ex with no repercussions at all. Let your fingers do the yelling. It doesn't matter how you keep your journal, in a notebook or on your computer. Just start writing and before you know it you will have found that YOU are the cure for dealing with a break up.

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The Chances of Getting Back With Ex - Slim or Good

You are desperate to know what your odds of getting back with ex are. Well, that depends on you and the amount of graft you are willing to put into trying to win them back. Some would say you have no control over this and that if your ex wants to come back then they will... if not... they will not. I do not necessarily agree with that line of thinking. There are things you can do to persuade your ex to reconsider their judgment to leave you.

There is plenty of help out there. You can do a search online for self-help eBooks or join a forum for some guidance on what to do. A lot of what you will hear and read may shock you, especially if you hold some animosity toward your ex for the things that went wrong. You will hear that a lot of the problem sits in your lap and if you want your ex back you need to work on yourself and the reasons they gave for breaking up with you.

They left for a reason but no matter what that rationale is or was you have the ability to get them back. You must be willing to do whatever it takes to make changes for the better and then find a way to let your ex see those changes. The chances of getting back with ex will increase to the highest degree if you take this step.

Your ex may see the changes you have made and start to reassess their decision or they may think you are full of BS and try not to care or not trust that you can change. Do not get disheartened, no one said this would be easy. If they rebuff you out of hand then just keep making the improvements in yourself. Do not get annoyed; accept that they cannot trust you right now because of past mistakes and work to become an improved person.

Did you know that with a modest effort 95% of relationships can be saved? That's right, if we all learned how to reach our full potential as human beings we could turn the 1 in 2 marriages that end in divorce around and most everyone could be happy.

Because men and women are so different we cannot expect to just move in together and be happy. There is a learning curve that most people just do not get. Too often when the honeymoon is over so is the marriage because couples just expect things to be perfect like they seem to be when you first get together. Love is definitely blind.

Sure... you met and fell in love but that is not all a good relationship is built on, nor can love sustain a relationship. It is a great building block or starting point but do not rely on it to keep things going. You also need mutual respect and willingness to compromise instead of getting annoyed when you do not get your way on every little point of contention. This only reduces the chances of getting back with ex.

If you do not learn these things and put them into practice during your relationship you will have to learn them when the relationship is over and then figure out what your chances of getting back with ex are at that point.

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How Can I Get My Girlfriend Back After I Cheated On Her?

 

The answer to the question 'how can I get my girlfriend back?' is yes... almost certainly. You see if your girl still loves you, no matter how much you've messed up in the past, she will more than likely be receptive to you if you can prove to her that she won't be wasting her time and that she won't get hurt again. No one wants to be hurt and no one wants to set themselves up to be hurt by trusting someone who has already proven they can't be trusted. For this reason you will almost certainly be able to win her back but you had better expect an uphill climb. 

The first step in the ‘how can I get my girlfriend back?’ solution is to give her a little time and space. Don't rush her or anticipate everything to happen quickly. It takes a lot longer to reconstruct trust than it took to tear it apart.  More than likely by the time you've gotten to this point you've let her down more than once. Please don't think that all that past hurt and all those mistakes will go away and she'll forget about them just because you say 'I'm sorry' or you tell her that ‘I've altered’. She'll almost certainly need to see some evidence that that is true.

It's imperative for you to concentrate on yourself instead of just trying to persuade her you've changed. It will take you time to truly change the person that you are and you don't want to make the mistake of thinking you can somehow ‘scam’ her into believing you are a different man. This is definitely not the answer to how can I get my girlfriend back?

It's true, you may be able to but what will that achieve? Eventually she'll just see that you've lied to her... again and she'll just leave you all over again. Eventually she won't fall for it and the two of you will truly be done. It’s much better to actually make the changes and make them everlastingly.  It will not only give you the answer to the question 'how can I get my girlfriend back?' it will also help you to keep the relationship strong and just make you a better man on the whole.

Depending on how much time has elapsed since the two of you broke up, you may want to start all over again. Imagine like the two of you are just getting to know each other. Take it very slow. The worst thing you can do at that point is to try and talk her into trusting you again. This is just more lip service. Instead try to spend time with her, just as a friend, and let her see that you've really changed. When she sees it with her own eyes it's much more likely that she'll learn to trust you again.

Remember, if you want to know 'how can I get my girlfriend back?' the answer really lies mostly with you. Love doesn't die that easily so unless you really treated her badly it's very likely that she still cares for you. It's up to you to prove to her that she's not a fool for it.

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How To Win Back Your Ex Free Advice

Want to know some useful tricks for how to win back your ex? Well, there are some things that may just work well for you. Of course, a lot of it depends on what happened between the two of you and how you've handled things since the break up.  If you've been off with the fairies it's going to take longer. The best thing to do is to get started today.

Give your partner some space. Don't be clingy, whiny, or needy. None of those things are a huge turn on and it's unlikely that if you act like that they are going to be thinking 'Wow, I'm really missing out'. Be you, don't get fixated with how to win back your ex, instead live your life and figure out how to improve on the person you are. What part did you play in the relationship falling apart?  Figure out what you did wrong and then improve on it.

No one is perfect and no one is completely to blame when a relationship falls apart. Figure out how you can improve and what you may have done that contributed to the demise of your relationship. Then address those issues so if you and your ex do get back together you can make it work this time around. Even if you and your ex aren't able to make things work, at least you'll be a better person and you'll bring a better person to all the other relationships you'll have. You really can't lose.

I know it may be hard for you to face up to some of your foibles but it is totally necessary.  Don't think, like many people do, that you can fix all the problems all by yourself either. For now it's enough for you to fix you but if the two of you do get back together it will have to be a mutual effort.  Unless you were with a total saint and you are completely responsible for the problems both of you will have to work on things. But that's something that will come later, for now it's all about you and how to win back your ex.

Once you've given your partner some space, and had some time to take a deep breath, the next thing you should do is try to find your ex and see if they want to get together.  Nothing fancy, don't act like the two of you are going to get back together, you're just getting together as friends.

When working out how to win back your ex, this meeting can tell you a lot about what your chances of making things work out really are.  For example, if the two of you do meet and your ex seems really happy to see you, that's a good sign. It might not turn into anything but it's definitely a good start.

But if your ex spends the whole time talking about their new love, it's not such a good sign.  Again, no matter what happens at least you can walk away knowing that you tried and that you didn't make a fool of yourself. Not only that, but you've spent some time improving the person you are. No matter what happens, these tips will help when it comes to how to win back your ex.

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Getting Back Together With An Ex - Is It Possible?

Getting back together with an ex, is it achievable, and if so how? First things first, yes it's achievable to get back together with your ex after a breakup but the exact method and timing will depend on several factors. For one thing, why did the two of you break up? Did you run off or did they? How long have you been broken up for? What have you said and done before, during and after the breakup? It's hard to give a one size fits all answer to that question but there are some familiar things that will work for most people.

First of all when getting back together with an ex, keep in mind, it takes two, no one person is totally accountable for everything that went wrong in the relationship, though that doesn't mean it's 50/50 either. Sometimes one person is more accountable for the trouble than the other.  Figure out where you are in all that. How much went wrong that you are directly to blame for? Come on, be honest. It may not be much fun to face up to the things you've done but if you really want your ex back it's the only way to do it. After all, why would they even consider getting back with you if you haven't altered at all?

Once you've figured out how you screwed up... the next step is to fix it. Nothing fancy, just figure out what areas you can use some improvement in and get better. This is a real win/ win situation. No matter what happens with your ex, you'll be a better person for the rest of your life. Not a bad deal all in all. Getting back together with an ex will require you to do this step.

Once you've faced things, made changes and are ready to show off what a great person you are, it's time to find your ex and let them see the all new you.  Again, this step will depend on how everything ended. Assuming there weren't too many sparks, and hopefully no restraining orders, you might want to nonchalantly recommend to your ex that the two of you get together.

Hopefully they'll accept, if not you may need to try to spend some time with mutual friends and let them see the new you. More often than not, word will get back to your ex about how much you've changed. It won't hurt to let your friends know that you want to get back with your ex... Your ex will probably hear about it through the grapevine.

When working towards getting back together with an ex, don’t meet with them with the idea of talking them into taking you back. Just meet with them and let them get to know you, the new you. Show them who you've become, talk is cheap, let your ex see for them self the changes you've made. That is the best way to convince them that the two of you have a chance of making things work this time around.

So, with some luck, patience and a lot of love you may just find that getting back together with an ex is possible and good for both of you.

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How to Get Back With Your Ex Boyfriend

Learning the tricks on how to get back with your ex boyfriend might be tougher than you thought, but it's not mission impossible. As a matter of fact it's almost certainly more possible than you may understand. The real difficulty is that in order to make things work this time around... you may almost certainly have to face up to some home truths.

What I mean is that in any relationship there are issues. Some issues are big and some are little. Sometimes the issues are fairly evenly separated between the two partners and sometimes it's almost exclusively one person’s fault that things fell apart.

In order to learn how to get back with your ex boyfriend you have to be willing to face whatever issues you brought to the relationship and that's not always fun to do.  If you're strong enough and determined enough to get him back than you'll find the strength you need to make things work.

One thing to look out for though... doesn’t make the mistake of thinking that just because you make changes everything will be great for the two of you. It might be if you were 100% at fault with everything that went off beam and your ex boyfriend was perfect, but of course, we both know that's not the case. You can't change your ex, only he can change himself but if he won't be willing to fix himself the way you are fixing yourself, it might be all for nothing.

How to get back with your ex boyfriend and what do you do to change?  Well, it depends on what your issues are but for the most part if you figure out your issues and you're completely truthful with yourself you can figure out why you have the issues you have.

For example, if you're overly jealous it usually means that you've either had someone cheat on you before or you just don't feel worthy of the love your boyfriend gives you. If you don't feel like your worth it, it's only natural that on some level you would think that he's made a big mistake loving you and that sooner or later he'll understand his mistake and leave you. This of course is not how to get back with your ex boyfriend!

That's not true of course, but if deep down that's how you feel than that's how you're going to react.  That could be a big issue in your relationships. The point is that if you're having trouble honestly pinpointing your own issues and the causes for them, then you won't be able to mend this relationship or any other for that matter. It's best that you find someone who can help you work through all of this. Don't get afraid of the idea of working with a counsellor, instead just find one that you like and feel secure with who can safely steer you in the direction you need to go.

It's really not all that hard learning how to get back with your ex boyfriend. It will take time and frankness on your part but if you can find the strength you will be able to have great relationships for the rest of your life, not just romantic ones either, but all of them.

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How to Get Your Ex Husband Back Into Your Life

If you want to know how to get your ex husband back the best answer I can give you is to figure out what went wrong... change it... let him see the changes and hope for the best. It may sound lame but that is actually very good advice and it works more often than not. 

But, there are some pitfalls you have to watch out for when dealing with how to get your ex husband back. For one thing, you shouldn't accept total liability unless you really are totally responsible. Women are very bad at trying to fix relationships; they will often carry more of the burden than they should. It's great that you want to find and fix whatever problems you have, you should, by all means, but don't take all the blame if all the responsibility isn't yours.

If you're not sure you can be as objective as you should be, just talk to friends and family. Listen to what they have to say about your ex.  Don't stick up for your ex, listen honestly and openly. Come from a place where you want to know the truth not from a place that you have to justify staying with someone who you maybe shouldn't stay with. That is not the best way to learn how to get your ex husband back.

Once you've got a starting point on what you did wrong and what your ex did wrong, you can start to make changes. Of course, you can't change your ex. Only he can change if he really wants to, but starting on you will benefit you in two ways and that might be all it takes.

For one thing, you'll be a better person. It's like knowledge; no one can ever take that away from you. If you spend time improving yourself it will pay dividends throughout your life and with all your relationships, not just your romantic ones. Also if you make changes and you and your ex do get back together it might spur him to make the changes he needs to make too. Sometimes we can use peer pressure in a good way. It's possible that he's so impressed with the woman that you've become that he wants to be a better man. If this happens your relationship can actually be better than it's ever been before.

How to get your ex husband back... make the changes, but don't stop living your life and don't pester him all the time. Give him some space and enjoy your life. Then, after you've had time to figure things out and improve on who you are, call him. Ask him if he'd like to get together as friends (I know, I used the 'f' word but at this point it's the best approach. If he thinks you're going to make a big scene about getting back together he won't meet you).

During this time just have fun, don't worry about what will happen tomorrow just enjoy each other’s company and let him see who you've become. That one single factor is the best answer to how to get your ex husband back.

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