6 Sure Ways to Build Trust in a Relationship

If there is one thing that is vital to any successful relationship, it's trust. It makes sense to do what you can to improve trust if you want to be a happy couple. The funny thing is that the things we often think will work end up having the opposite effect. So, what can you do? You can start by following any of the following six tips to help you build trust in a relationship. 

1- "Spice things up?" That's what your well-meaning friends will try to tell you do at the first sign of trouble. While this may work in some cases, it may not be the best course of action if you are trying to gain more trust. What often works is being predictable. That's because it goes hand in hand with expectations. It's easier to trust somebody if you have some idea of what they will do in certain situations. That's what we're talking about here. You don't have to be a boring, mindless machine, but do try to have some level of predictability.

2 - Congruity. What's that? That's just a fancy way of saying that you should say what you mean and mean what you say. No matter how good you think you are at saying something, if you don't really feel that way your body language won't match. Criminologists who specialize in lie detection are trained to spot these incongruities. If they can do it, how much better will your partner be at it? After all, they know you much better. Nobody likes a phony. So be sure your body language matches your words if you want to build trust in a relationship.

3 - Give to get. Ever wish your partner would trust you more? There's one sure way to make that happen, and it's by trusting them first. It doesn't matter if you think you're more trustworthy or not. It is incredibly difficult to trust somebody who doesn't trust you. Believe in your partner. Try to catch your significant other telling the truth, and also operate from the expectation that they are telling the truth in the first place. It will help, and keep things running more smoothly.

4 - Be an open book. Keeping secrets is a form of dishonesty and is counterproductive to building trust. If it helps, assume your partner will find out eventually anyway; so they may as well learn the truth from you. Simple.

5 - What do you need? Your partner isn't a mind reader. You have to be clear as to what your needs are, as to what you want, and so on. It's also important to assert yourself when you need to. Again, don't leave it to your partner to guess. They will usually be wrong and will lead to a loss of trust.

6 - Grow as a couple. Just like a garden, a relationship needs the right kind of care and cultivation for it to be bountiful Go through new experiences, good or bad, together. Be there for each other. By doing this you will deepen the level of trust in your relationship. Decide that it is indeed important to build trust in a relationship and work together to make it happen. You will be a stronger, happier couple as a result.

Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up

How to Find the Best Books on Relationships

The ideal relationship is hard to come by. Nobody's perfect, so even the best of intentions aren't always enough to keep two people together. If your relationship is on shaky ground, or you've recently split up, then you may be interested in books on relationships. They are among the most popular categories of books, and tons of new titles are thrust upon consumers on a regular basis. So, how can you choose what the best books on relationships are? Good question, let's see if we can answer it.

To begin with, don't let a series of letters after the author's name impress you. All the letters mean is that they have earned a degree of some kind (assuming they credentials are legitimate). It doesn't mean automatically mean they understand relationships. Sure, they may understand what a text book says, and what the leading theories are, but that's not the same as practical experience. That expertise doesn't mean all that much when it comes to real people.

Instead of looking at all the abbreviations after their names, you should try to look for their life experience. How long have they been in a relationship? Did they go through a rough time and then fix it? Have they helped others? Do they offer proof? A quick way to find out is to read the author bio near the front or back of the book and see if these things are mentioned.

This next method for finding the best books on relationships is harder, but worthwhile if you are able to do it. But the books that aren't the same idea re-written in twenty different ways. Some books are so filled with fluff, when they could be summed up in one sentence like, "be nice to each other". Such products aren't worth the money or time it takes to read them. What you need are books that offer new information, and several different solutions. Another way of looking at it is specific steps are better than vague generalities.

Finally, take a look at those who are recommending any of the books you are interested in. Do they have an air of generality about them? Do they all sort of sound the same, maybe written by the same person? Do they mention actual situations and results? Read the recommendations and see how they all add up. Also, see if the people making the comments are from different backgrounds and located in different places.

You will get some idea by the words they use and how they use them. The idea is that the more wide-ranging the happy readers are, the more likely the book will be right for you.

The sad truth is that there are a lot of poorly written books and guides on staying together or getting back together. Don't let that thought discourage you, though. There are plenty of titles counted among the best books on relationships. If you don't find one right away, keep trying, it's worth it.

Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up

5 Best Ways to Get Back At Your Ex

The relationship between two people is a delicate bond. A bond that requires building up and maintenance for the relationship to flourish and be healthy. The sad fact is that breaking up is a reality and is often frustrating, stressful and nerve wracking. After a break up it is perfectly normal for you to want to get back at your ex.  

However, you need to ask yourself if that's really the best thing to do. The art of getting back at your ex can actually lead to getting back together with your ex. By applying the following five tips, your ex may appreciate you more, and want to get back together with you.

1) Stay strong. The last thing you want to do is beg. Acting needy and clingy smacks of hopeless desperation, and is more of a turn off than anything. Also, by being weak you will be giving more power to your ex, and that tends to make things worse. Instead, give your ex the impression that you are doing fine without them by staying strong. Perhaps your ex will realize you have moved on, but they weren't as ready to split as they first thought.

2) Reduce communication. What? You may be wondering how not talking to each other could ever help you get your ex back. It seems so counterintuitive. But in the long run, it can be a smart move. It gives both parties a chance to cool down and reassess what went wrong. Additionally, it gives your ex more time to miss you. The old saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" is true in this case and can lead to being together again.

3) Flexibility is vital. Avoid ultimatums and demands. Instead of arguing, try sympathizing and listening. Go with the flow and be flexible. Your ex may be happy to see that you are willing to compromise and be reasonable. This alone may be enough get them thinking about being a couple again. Plus, it shows them that you don't always have to argue. (Now, how did I know you have argued in the past?)

4) Go out! Look, you broke up...everybody gets that. But that doesn't mean you need to wallow in self-pity and isolate yourself from your friends and having a good time. Go out. Live a little. Have fun. Be with friends. You don't need to start dating to prove a point, just have a good time. Not only will doing this be therapeutic, it will also make you look better in the eyes of your ex.

5) Be yourself. That's all. Just be who you are. Chances are that your ex was originally attracted to some element, or elements of who you really are. Be confident in being whoever you are. Nobody likes a phoney, and your ex, in time, may respond to the same things they found so appealing when they first met you. Mending those broken bonds is a sure way to get your ex back for good.

Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up

Can You Win Your Love Back?

Can you win your love back? Men and women from all over the world ask themselves this question over and over again, day in and day out. Some of them will just continue to ask the question, or try winning their loves back through persuasion or begging. But the truth of the matter is, you cannot control another person's actions, no matter how much you want to or how right you think you are. What you can do is control yourself, and how you come across to other people.

So when you're making a plan to win your love back, instead of focusing on him or her, you need to focus on yourself. Remember that it is not impossible to rekindle your ex's love for you. And also remember that in most situations, the ex still cares for his or her partner. Whatever happened to cause the breakup cannot be taken back, but you can work on not letting those things happen again when and if you know what they are.

Back to the main point of this article . . . how do you get your ex back? There are actually some very straightforward steps that you can take to accomplish this. And these have been proven to work again and again. The very first step is to leave your ex alone, if you haven't already done so. That's right. Just let him or her go. If you've been pestering him or her up until now, this first step will actually work very well right away. Your ex will wonder what happened to make you stop. And then, instead of thinking of how to ward you off, or being annoyed with you, he or she will start wondering if you've met someone else. And they may actually start to regret not having given you a chance. Do not give in at this stage. Avoid all contact if possible. If your ex happens to seek you out in this stage, you can answer his or her calls. Be cordial and say it was nice to hear from them. But do not ask to meet or ever initiate any kind of correspondence. If he or she asks you why you haven't called, just explain that you've been thinking about stuff. If they want to talk about getting back together, by all means listen, and try to make an objective decision about what to do. Do not say "Yes!" immediately.

But in most cases, your ex will not start calling you only because you've stopped calling them. So, use this "away-time" to better yourself by eating right, exercising, getting enough sleep, taking time to look nice when you go out to work or out for fun, and just relaxing. You need time to build yourself back up so that when you do contact your ex again, you will be able to present a strong, healthy, catch to him or that he would not want to pass up. In very general terms, that's how you win your love back.


Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up

Is It Possible To Save My Marriage?

Is it possible to save my marriage? If you're in what feels like a loveless marriage or you're already at the point of separation and/or divorce, you may very well be asking yourself this question. Often times, only one person in the marriage is thinking this question. The other either doesn't even realize there is something wrong, or just wants out altogether. If you are thinking that you need to start working on your marriage because it feels like it's in a downward plunge, or you want to get your marriage back, then here are a few tips you can use.

The first step in order to be able to answer your question of "Will I be able to save my marriage?” is to take a step back from it. Try to analyze your situation objectively, without all the emotions. This is hard, and it is probably harder if you are still in the marriage but do the best you can. Write things down. Try to figure out turning points, mistakes, what went wrong, and how you could have possibly avoided it. If you have already split with your husband or wife, minimize contact as much as possible so that you can have the time to get a more objective perspective. This is not about blaming, but rather about assessing the situation so try to do this without placing blame on yourself or on your spouse. When you are doing this, try to pick out the real reasons for problems, not the symptoms. For example, if one of you cheated, that is not really the problem, but the result of an underlying problem, or several of them. Of course, that just adds to all the problems because a relationship is based on trust, and cheating really violates that. But there were other issues that lead to the cheating as well. You may also want to see a counsellor or therapist who can help you determine some of the problems and give you an unbiased viewpoint.

After the "assessment phase" comes the time for action. This is where you should speak to your spouse about what you've been analyzing. This is most likely not going to be fun so gear up for some opposition and prepare to be strong. You of course want to listen what he or she has to say, but make sure that your voice is heard too. Also be prepared to change your mind if your spouse brings up something that you hadn't realized or thought of. This is not particularly enjoyable, but at least you are communicating. And communication is the key to all relationships, whether it is marriage, friendship, work, etc. Continue to communicate. If it seems that you are continuously butting heads over every little point, and neither of you is willing to listen or give in, then the answer to the question of "Is it possible to save my marriage" might be no. But if you see even a little bit of progress, hold on to that and make it work.

Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up

How Do I Get My Ex Back?

How do I get my ex back is a question that goes through many post-breakup minds. While every relationship and every breakup is different, there are certain strategies that can help you win back your loved one. Many people think that they lost their loved one because of one specific incident or mistake, but the more probable cause was one that lasted over months, or even years, and it generally includes a lack of communication. However, if you've already lost your ex, then now is not the time to scramble to start communicating again. Start with this plan of action:

Accept the break-up. This doesn't mean that the answer to "How do I get my ex back?" is no. It just means that you need to spend some time apart from your ex for now, and if you have been harassing him or her in a desperate attempt to get back together, you need to stop that now. You have a much greater chance of winning him or her back when you back off a little bit than you do by pleading, promising, begging, threatening, etc.

Try to avoid all contact. If this is not possible due to certain circumstances (like you have children that will bring you into contact, or you work together, etc.), then just minimize the contact as much as possible and keep it unemotional. Be cordial and civil but do not go beyond that. In this stage, you want to start focusing on yourself. Take this time off to better yourself. Make sure that you are eating healthy meals, exercising, and taking care of yourself. Whether you feel like it or not, start going out with friends, or join some kind of activity or volunteer group that interests you. Spend more quality time with your kids. And, if possible, scarey as it may be, spend some time alone. This all may be forced in the beginning. But if you stick with it, you will find that you start to feel better about yourself, your confidence will rise, and you will also look more attractive to others. You'll start to hear people complimenting you and seeking you out.

At this point you should re-evaluate your situation again with your ex - many people who have gotten to this point realize that they do not even want to get back together with that person again. But if you still feel that this is your goal, now is the time to start the contact again. Call him or her and make a very non-commital date such as going out for coffee. If you've managed to stay separated from your ex all this time, it's likely that your ex will be curious as to what you are up to. Your first "date" should be short and "light". Don't bring up past arguments. Make sure that you make an excuse to be the first to leave, claiming that you have an appointment, and saying how nice it was to see your ex again. This is the first step in the How do I get my ex back strategy.

Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up

How to Win Your Ex Back with Ease

Have you been wondering how to win your ex back? You are not alone. All over the world, people have wondered and are wondering the same exact thing. The good news is that it has been done, and it has been done frequently. While it may seem impossible to you now, winning your ex back is not a huge impossible feat. Rather, it is just a process that may take longer than you want it to. But it is a process that works if you follow it through correctly.

The first step of how to win your ex back might be the hardest. This step involves accepting the split, or even the fact that your ex has someone else, and just letting it be. No more pleading, begging, apologizing, or threatening by phone, text or email. The first step is to walk away and steer as clear from your ex as possible.

The next step is to stop focusing on your ex, and trying to win them back, and instead focus on yourself. If you've been pleading with your ex for a long time, and been taking her refusals for just as long, your confidence has also probably taken a nose dive. You first need to get your confidence and your self-esteem back. There are many things you can do to start feeling better about yourself. First of all, make sure you are eating the right foods, getting enough sleep, and exercising. Do not drink too much to drown your sorrows, or get into some other kind of drug or addictive habit. You also want to force yourself to start going out with friends, or just spending some time alone.

If you like your job, throw yourself into your work. If you need a break from work, take a vacation if possible. All of these things may take some time getting used to, but you will soon find that they are not forced anymore, but part of your new way of life. You will start looking better, attracting more interest and compliments, and feeling better about yourself. And this will continue to grow. Once you go through several weeks or months of this "me-time", you can take another more objective look at your goals in terms of a relationship. Do you still want your ex in your life? If so, move on to the next step.

The last step is really what you've been gearing towards all along. This is where you contact your ex and ask if he or she will meet you. The meeting should be something very easy, like getting together for coffee. The real purpose for this meeting is to let your ex see the new and improved you, not to try and convince her to come back to you. So, keep the conversation light, be complimentary to him or her without going overboard, and then look at your watch and say you need to go to another appointment. Say how great it was to see your ex, and be off. These are the first steps in how to win your ex back.

Get FREE Advice from the man that has helped 50,000+ couples get back together... The Magic of Making Up