Sunday, 12 May 2013

How to Rekindle a Marriage

Is it possible to rekindle a marriage? That of course depends on what issues or problems are or has caused the marriage to collapse. Almost all relationships can be saved with the right approach and strategy as long as the reasons for its deterioration is not violent or abusive behaviour.

Life, career and children sometimes cause us to lose perspective and direction. Think about when your marriage was at its best, what was going on in your life and why was it good? We sometimes lose the camaraderie that pulled us together in the first place and consequently feel alone. You know the expression ‘can’t see the wood for trees’ well sometimes those who are most important to us get lost in the trees and we forget they are there and that they need our love and support.

If you are asking how to rekindle a marriage I guess you have lost your way and at the very least are questioning the validity of your marriage going forward. Our relationships are at their best when we are looking forward, before your first house together, first child, beginning a new job in a new area. These things are all exciting and it’s easy to feel very much in love when exiting things are on the horizon and that’s why you must have goals together with or without children.

Looking forward to every day together and taking on challenges together is all part of being a couple and consequently marriage, so when you no longer do that your relationship changes. For some people the change is fine and they go on together still very much in love but with a different and deeper loving relationship involving kids where the couple’s future goals now hinge on the children.

In gay relationships for instance there are in most cases no children so the couple have to have goals together that involve just themselves. Similarly when any couples children grow up and leave them they find themselves alone together as they were in the beginning but now very different people, older, wiser, more financially secure where most personal goals have been achieved although with some war wounds. So what do you look forward to? And ‘cake’ although always good in its own right is not a valid answer.

My point is that sometimes it’s not the marriage that needs rekindling but our lives, it’s hard to be enthusiastic about anything when you envisage a dull future. It is human nature to look forward and to want more or we wouldn’t have come this far and this is in all of us in different degrees. Whether it is the house you always wanted by the sea or the dream kitchen you never got the chance to do… you must have something to work towards and achieve together to get that excitement and enthusiasm for life back in your marriage. 

Any couple you meet whether they are middle aged, young or old are happy together when planning something new in the future. As many years as a kitchen designer I met thousands of couples that were on top of the world because they had projects on the go and exciting things happening in their lives. You need to spice up your life and work towards some meaningful goals together to rekindle your marriage. Exciting people lead exciting lives, rekindle your life and you will rekindle your marriage!

If you want to be more successful in love or recapture a lost love all you need is a tried and tested strategy and the knowledge to capitalize on that strategy. Click Here and find out how to become more successful in your relationships or how to recapture lost love!

Sunday, 10 June 2012

Getting Over a Break up

Relationships end for many reasons and it can be the most difficult thing to deal with. But there are things you can do to make it easier. If you need advice on getting over a break up read on…

When a relationship ends even if it is a mutual arrangement there is a grieving period. That period of uncertainty that no one is really comfortable with. Most of us like order and routine because it makes us feel safe and secure. Disruption to our routine and order is what upsets us the most when, especially a long relationship ends. This coupled with missing the companionship is what makes it especially difficult to deal with.

You will find that some of the oldest advice is still prevalent today such as, keep busy, get out and do things you enjoy, spend time with people who love you like family and old friends etc. Of course each situation is different and you may find it difficult to do some of these things. Getting over a break up is never easy and if you can do these things it will be much easier to cope with.

Time heals and by keeping busy the time will pass more quickly and the more distractions you have the better. When following this advice you just have to make sure you endeavour to pursue positive and constructive pursuits and not negative. By keeping busy we don’t mean going out and getting out of order. This will only lead to more regret and possibly a worse situation than you are already in.

What we mean is, concentrate on your career and hobbies. Work hard and focus on getting a promotion or retraining to change profession if you are bored with what you do or want a better life. Focus on positive pursuits and reward yourself for achievement by pursuing your hobbies or interests that perhaps lapsed when you become embroiled in your relationship. You must look forward and not dwell on the past as you can’t change the past but you can change the future.

I don’t know your circumstances but if your relationship is definitely over, you must move on and pursue a life of fulfilment elsewhere. We are only here once and we have to make the best of the time we have as any elderly relative will tell you, your life passes very quickly. Don’t dwell, take control and work towards a better life now, whether it is emotional or financial, you snooze… you lose!

Now if your relationship isn’t completely over and there are reasons for the split that can be rectified you need help. The best way of getting over a break up is to set about repairing the relationship if it’s possible. There are many guides to doing this and believe me, you will need guidance. You will not be able to do this on your own. Get an expert to help, whether it is a marriage councillor or quality relationship manual or guru… get some therapy!

Whichever route you take it will not be easy, life isn’t easy but if we soldier on and pursue our goals the rewards are amazing. Little victories turn into big ones so I wish you luck and wish you well.

If you want to be more successful in love or recapture a lost love all you need is a tried and tested strategy and the knowledge to capitalize on that strategy. Click Here and find out how to become more successful in your relationships or how to recapture lost love!

Saturday, 24 March 2012

Mending a Broken Heart - Simple Ways to Cope With the Pain

Author: Shampa

It happens to everyone. You invest a lot of time and emotion into a relationship with someone and for one reason or another it doesn't work out. The destruction of a personal relationship can be a very devastating feeling. The pain and emotions that come along with a broken relationship can hurt almost as bad as a physical pain to any part of the body. Luckily there are a number of activities and ways that you can work on mending a broken heart that will help lessen the pain that comes along with broken relationships.

Many women find help to recover from a break up through the support and love of various friends and family members. There is something about the comfort and love that surrounding ourselves with these types of people has that allows the heart to mend a little faster. These people help those dealing with a broken relationship realize that the world has not ended and there are people who still love and support you. It might seem simple but just doing small activities with others can help lessen the emotional pain that comes with a separation. If activities aren't helping, just having a friend or family member serve as a shoulder to cry on can help ease any pain that you might feel.

Another popular way to help aid in mending a broken heart is to allow yourself to work on you as an individual. This can include discovering new hobbies or picking up an activity that you haven't done in a while. Working on yourself as an individual can also include doing some self evaluation and helping you find out more about yourself. Many people have expressed that they have used the time while recovering from a bad break up to learn a lot about themselves as an individual. Self exploration and individual soul searching are all ways to help heal the pain associated with the end of a relationship, with the added benefit of mending that broken heart.

There is no exact science behind what to do when it comes to mending a broken heart. What works for one person might not work for another. There are hundreds of various ways of handling a broken relationship. If something isn't working for you, try another technique. With the hundreds of possibilities out there, there has to be something that can help you get through this painful, emotional time.

Even the longest relationships have to face an ending. But don't ever think that you're the only one who's hurt because believe it or not, you're ex gets hurt too! the ways below can help you mend your aching heart.
Week One: Things to do
The toughest of the days is the within the span of one week after the separation. Experienced individuals say that the feeling of pain is like a gunshot that kills you a lot. Remember, what doesn't kill you would make you stronger.
1. Spare a day or two to grieve over the situation. Do whatever it takes to make you feel good. Bear in mind that whatever the situation is, happiness is a choice.

2. Renew yourself. Maybe all you need is a little makeover like a new haircut, or soothe yourself a spa. When the way you look and how fit you are changes, your feeling towards self worth increases.. That's something to look forward to.

3. Stay away from souvenirs. Put off everything that resembles your past. You don't need them anymore. Throw them divided or only censor them for the time being. Keep them away from the scene and out of your memory.

4. Find your old buddies. Chat with them and express what you feel. It would probably make you feel better after that.

You could break all rules but one, DON'T EVER CONTACT YOUR EX. Don't dare thinking about the went before or even affiliation with others. Set your mind to things that makes you feel good.
In the next days:

Here's what you have to do after the first seven days In the next days, try to live your normal life back

1. Hit the town with your old pals. Make up the time you've lost for your friends. Maybe with some drinks, for a walk, do what it takes to make it up to them. Choose the right pals that could take away your loneliness, bound yourself with their presence.

2. Be sociable and try to meet new acquaintances. Having a set of new friends can create a new aura. However, it doesn't give you the right to enter into another commitment. Fix yourself first before entering to a new relationship.

3. Allow the time to mend you. It's only a matter of time you'll surely get rid of the pain away. Like the passage of a poem, "Forgetting is time-consuming but love is short".

What are the ways to fix a busted heart? Do you have things in mind? Do the cited ways above and stay away from bad vibes, it will surely mend your pain. Should you wish additional information, hear it from The Magic of Making Up.

About the Author

Mark Mc Niel writes for http://www.mendyourbrokenheart.com/ where you can find a wide range tips and advices regarding for healing a broken heart and handling the end of a relationship.

If you want to be more successful in love or recapture a lost love all you need is a tried and tested strategy and the knowledge to capitalize on that strategy. Click Here and find out how to become more successful in your relationships or how to recapture lost love!